Thoughts on being single

God created women to be a help meet for men. (Gen. 2:18)
A virtuous woman has a honorable husband. (Prov. 31:23)
Young women are commanded to love their husbands. (Titus 2:3-5)
The older women are to teach the younger women how to do so. (Titus 2:3-5)
Women are to submit to their husbands. (Ephesians 5:22)

I understand all that.

God has a plan for the way a home and a family works. The man is the head of the household and the woman is his supporter and helper. She submits to his authority, he loves her like Christ loved the church (Eph. 5:22-25).

So what does that mean for a single woman today? If you don't have a husband, what does all of that mean to you?

I'm beginning to wonder if this is one of those questions that is unanswerable... You know the kind - like why do children die of cancer? And if God tells us to be fruitful and multiply then why do people have problems with infertitlity?

Why do some people have to go through life alone?

It seems like such a heavy cross to bear, but Paul considered being single a blessing:

"I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them to abide even as I." I Corinthians 7:7-8

I can understand what he was saying there. When you're single, sometimes the only person you have to talk to is God. That can really deepen your relationship with Him, while if you were married or in a romantic relationship you probably would spend that precious time with another person instead of spending it with God.

Plus, the people in Corinth were having problems within their marriages. He continues the chapter with warnings against divorce and fornication.

He even encourages the young, single men and women in verse 25: "Now concerning virgins I have no commandment of the Lord: yet I give my judgment, as one that hath obtained mercy of the Lord to be faithful."

Be faithful.

Those two words are encouraging and discouraging at the same time. It's good to know that you can always count on God, but it can be so hard to wait on His timing. It's always worth it, but that doesn't make the wait any easier.

So what does all this mean for people like me - people that hope to someday be married, but just haven't gotten there yet? Paul sums it up pretty well in 1 Corinthians 7:34b "The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit."

We are to be faithful and remain pure and holy.

A hard task? Sometimes it can be. But God has His reasons.

God says "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you," in Matthew 7:7. He wants His children to be happy. Tell Him about your dreams and desires. And have hope for the future, but don't spend so much time living in the future that you forget to enjoy the present.

Are you available?

Our God is all-powerful. He can do anything that He wants. And yet, He chooses to use us - unreliable, imperfect people - to carry out His will. He chooses to work in our lives; not because He needs us, but because He loves us.

I was listening to the Ty Show on WDJC tonight and heard Matt Pitt, the founder of The Basement (a huge youth rally in Birmingham). He was talking about how God uses ordinary people to do extraordinary things. I love this quote from him:

"God doesn't need your ability. He needs your availability."

This is so true! Need proof? Check out the New Testament. When Jesus began His ministry, He didn't go to the Temple to find strong religious leaders to be His disciples. Instead, Jesus called on normal, common men that were a little (or in some cases, a lot) rough around the edges. He called Peter, a hot-headed fisherman. He called Matthew, a tax collector. He called James and John while they were in their fishing boat.

When Jesus met these men, He didn't ask them what abilities they had that would help His ministry. He didn't ask them about their strengths and weaknesses. He simply asked them to follow Him. He didn't need any ability that they had. He just needed for them to be available and for them to be willing to walk with Him.

That's all God is asking of us today. He doesn't need a list of your talents. He knows what they are already because He blessed you with them. He doesn't need a list of your weaknesses and excuses. He already knows about them, and He has the power to overcome them. All He wants is for us to follow Him.

When we choose to be available for God, He will take our ordinary lives and make them extraordinary.

Need some encouragement?

In Deuteronomy 31:6, we are told, "Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee."

When we are facing hard times, we can count on God! Whether you need a cheerleader to lift you up or a coach to straighten you out, God offers you the encouragement that you need to get through anything.

Check out the Young Women Active for Christ Bible Study for January at www.wnac.org for some more encouragement this month!

Called to Wait

I've never liked waiting for things. If there's something I want, I want it now. Patience is a virtue, and it is one that I am constantly working on and stuggling to practice.

I recently read an article about the Biblical roles of men and women in relationships. This is something I have noticed a lot of Christian writers and speakers focusing on lately, and I think it's because our culture tries to tell us that the sexes are equal. We are taught from society that women can do anything men can do and vice versa. We are taught that men and women were created equally, but when you look into the Scripture, you can see that is not the case.

God created men to be leaders. He gave them practical minds and leadership skills. He gave them dominion over all the other creatures of the world.

God created women to be helpers. He made them nurturing. He gave them the gifts of creativity and multi-tasking and the wonderful priveledge of bringing life into the world.

He created us very differently, because He had designed two very different roles for us to fill.

The article I read ("Designed To Be Different" by Candice Watters, The Brink Magazine, Fall 2010, Randall House Publishing) talked about these differences and how they affect our relationships. One part that especially stuck out to me was:

"My friend Carolyn McCulley illustrated one of these differences in a talk she gave about romance, 'Men trust God by risking rejection. Women trust God by waiting.' We're equally called to trust, but in different ways.

That's hard to hear. Why the difference? For women, it feels passive. For both, unfair. Yet from Genesis forward, God made male and female distinct. We are the same at the cross, equally in need of redemption, equally invited to receive it. But in our sexuality, we are not the same."

That's something I have never thought about before. Male and female are both called to trust God when it comes to relationships, but in different ways. And I have to admit, its a hard thing to do.

Because just like Mrs. Watters said in her article, waiting feels so passive. Finding a spouse is one of the most important things we will do on this earth. And it can be really hard to wait for God to send that person.

One of the hardest things for me to accept has been that I am not promised a spouse. I'm still not sure if I have accepted the fact that Mr. Right may never come. It's something that I have always assumed would happen. Getting married has always been in my plan. But I don't know if it is in God's plan or not. All I can do is trust and wait.

The Little Things

Lately, I have been noticing the little things in life more and more. A kind word from a friend, a note in the mail, or someone complementing my outfit...those kinds of little things can have big effects when it comes to my mood. I can be having an all around crummy day and someone can write a one sentence greeting on my Facebook page or send me a silly joke in a text and POOF! My day is better. All because of a little thing.

Little things can have big impacts. Thankfully, God sends us little things like I mentioned above to remind us that He loves and cares for us and that we have friends that love and care for us, too. But God isn't the only one that uses little things to impact our lives.

Satan is a master at taking something extremely small and using it to throw us into a tailspin. How many times have you gotten angry or upset over a little thing? Unfortunately, for me, it's far too many times.

Just like happy comments can lift my spirit, I have a tendancy to let little snide remarks ruin my day. I let other people's bad attitudes dictate the way I feel and act. I let the little things that shouldn't matter - like the fact that one person isn't happy with something I did - get in the way of me experiencing the joy God wants me to have.

Why do the little things have so much control over me? I think it's because they are so unexpected and unpredictable. You can't plan spilling coffee on your favorite shirt on the way to school. It just happens. You don't wake up in the morning hoping that someone will be mean to you. It just happens. You don't plan on losing your keys or having a bad hair day. Those things just happen. And there isn't a thing you can do about it.

What I struggle to remember is that life is not always about how I feel. When the little things get me down, I have to remember that God still loves me. When I feel unappreciated, I have to remember that God is trying to reach me humility and that He sees the work I am doing and that He is with me through my discouragement. When I don't feel pretty, I have to remember that God created me and that I am beautiful in His eyes because I am His. Life is not about the way I feel, it's about knowing God's truths.

But that can be hard to remember when the little things blow up in your face... I love the chorus from Francesca Battistelli's new song, "The Stuff":

"This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I've gotta trust that You know exactly what You're doing
It may not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use."

Right now, I choose not to let the little things overwhelm me. I choose to focus on the little things that bring me joy instead. And I choose to focus on God instead of on myself - on His purpose for the lost keys and the bad hair days and the little messes of life.

Walking by faith

When I was little, one of my favorite cartoons was Winnie the Pooh. I must have watched my tape of Winnie the Pooh and Tigger Too thousands of times. In the movie, Rabbit gets angry with Tigger and decides to teach him a lesson.

Rabbit took Tigger deep into the woods, planning to get him lost and leave him to find his way out alone. In the process of trying to get Tigger lost, Rabbit ended up getting himself lost. Once he ditched Tigger, he wandered around in the woods for hours, until it finally got dark.

Alone in the mist, Rabbit started to see the woods as a really scary place. Every ribbit of a frog or snap of a twig made his skin crawl. His heart was beating fast. He was lost, alone and very afraid.

Have you ever felt that way? Too many times, we end up like Rabbit - wandering around in the dark. But that's not how God wants his people to live.

In John 8:12, Jesus said, "I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life." The last thing God wants is for us to walk around lost in the darkness. After all, how can we point others toward the Light if was can't see it ourselves?

God knew that this world would try to get us lost and confused. He knew that the darkness would be overwhelming for us. That's why He sent the Light of the world (Jesus) to save us from our sin and ourselves.

So, what happens when we feel lost and alone? Paul told the people at Corinth to "walk by faith, not by sight" (2 Cor. 5:7). If anyone knew what it was like to have to walk by faith, it was Paul.

Before he was a champion of the New Testament church, Paul was a big bully named Saul. He traveled around persecuting Christians. He had chosen to walk in the darkness of his sin. But on his way to Damascus (to pick on some more Christians, of course), he saw the Light of the world.

Have you ever walked out of a dark place into bright sunlight? It hurts your eyes, right? Well, after walking around in the dark for so long, when Saul saw the Light of Jesus, it hurt! He was literally blinded by the Light (Acts 9). Saul had to learn really quickly what it meant to walk by faith.

Eventually, Saul's sight was restored and he began to preach the Gospel. Everyone that heard him knew that he had been changed, and they all knew it had to be because of Christ. Nothing else could have taken Saul and turned him into Paul.

Paul didn't promise the people at Corinth that it would be easy to walk by faith. I'm sure it wasn't easy for him. In Acts 9:16, God said that Paul would have to suffer for Christ. We know that the Christian life is not perfect and that it's not always easy, but if we are faithful to God, He will be faithful to us.

Wondering what happened to Rabbit? Check out the video below:



You know, when we're wandering around in the mist, God knows where we are. He never gets lost. And He can show us the way home - if we walk by faith and follow Him.

"But now thus saith the Lord that created thee...Fear not! For I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine! Even every one that is called by my name: for I have created [her] for my glory, I have formed [her]; yea, I have made [her]." Isaiah 43:1 and 7 (emphasis added)

Have you ever watched a marathon? The runners usually wear shirts with the name or logo of their sponsor on them. They often dedicate their performance in the race to a charity, or maybe a loved one or friend.

We are all like runners in a marathon. In 1 Corinthians 9:24-25, Paul wrote, "Know ye not that they which run in a race run all, but one receiveth the prize? So run, that ye may obtain. And every man that striveth for the mastery is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a corruptible crown; but we an incorruptible."

The New Living Translation words that verse like this: "Don't you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win! All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize."

If our lives are like a race, then God is our Creator, Sustainer, and Trainer. He calls us by His name (Isaiah 43:1). We run wearing His image (Genesis 1:26). We represent Him. The way we run reflects on Him.

What kind of a representative for Christ are you?

Are you a good representative for God in the way you honor your body as His temple?

"Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and the the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are." 1 Corinthians 3:16-17

Come check out our L.E.A.P.F.R.O.G. Class on Monday nights at 6:30!

Every Second Matters

The video posted above is an AT&T commercial advertising their broadband network. At the end of the commercial, they use the tag line "every second matters."

I love the way the video is split - showing what could have happened in each instance, all depending on the timing of something small.

This video reminds me of two things: First, that every second matters and that we are responsible for the way we use our time. Second, that God works through the little things, every second of the day.

One of my favorite quotes is: "Choices, no matter how small, do matter. Your day-to-day decisions have a way of determining your destiny. The person you are becoming - situation by situation, choice by choice, decision by decision - is the person you will be forever." David Ausberger

Our lives are all hanging on one choice. One decision, one situation, one choice can change your life forever. Just like one second made a difference in the video, it can make a difference in your life.

Thankfully, we don't have to rely on AT&T to orchestrate every second of our lives. The Master of the Universe is in charge of our every second. He decides when to give us open doors. He decides when to give us those choices, decisions and situations that make such a difference in our lives.

That doesn't mean that God is just a puppeteer, sitting up in Heaven pulling our strings. He gave us minds that think and reason. He gave us each our own free will. He gives us the freedom to use our seconds as we please.

"God gave you the gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say 'thank you'?" - William Arthur

"So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom." Psalm 90:12

"For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad." 2 Corinthians 5:10

Every second matters.

How will you use yours?

The Words I Would Say

Sorry that I haven't updated the blog in the last few days. I just haven't felt very inspired to write anything lately.

I just wanted to share the lyrics to the song "The Words I Would Say" by Sidewalk Prophets. This song is really great, and it has an awesome message.

Three in the morning

And I'm still awake

So I picked up a pen and a page

And I started writing

Just what I'd say

If we were face to face

I'd tell you just what you mean to me

I'd tell you these simple truths

Be strong in the Lord

Never give up hope

You're gonna do great things

I already know

God's got His hand on you, so

Don't live life in fear

Forgive and forget

But don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

These are the words I would say

Last time we spoke

You said you were hurting

And I felt your pain in my heart

I want to tell you

That I keep praying

Love will find you where you are

I know, 'cause I've already been there

So please hear these simple truths

Be strong in the Lord

Never give up hope

You're gonna do great things

I already know

God's got His hand on you, so

Don't live life in fear

Forgive and forget

But don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

These are the words I would say

From one simple life to another

I will say

Come find peace in the Father

Be strong in the Lord

Never give up hope

You're gonna do great things

I already know

God's got His hand on you, so

Don't live life in fear

Forgive and forget

But don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

Thank God for each day

His love will find a way

These are the words I would say

What an awesome song of encouragement! I want to encourage all of you to write notes of encouragement to your friends and family that are going through difficult times. You never know how much it can mean just to get a little note saying that someone cares!

Also, please be in prayer for the family of Mrs. Geraldine Strickland. She passed away Wednesday morning. Visitation will be held at Magnolia Funeral Home on Thursday from 5:00 until 7:00 p.m. and the funeral will be at the church on Friday at 2:00 p.m.